Normalize Sleeping In Separate Bedrooms Like Old-School Hollywood

Getting adequate sleep is romantic.

Jennifer Barnett
5 min readDec 2, 2020
Feel free to entertain whomever you like in your boudoir

My preference is to live in a gothic estate where my bedroom features a wood burning fireplace and my night-time routine includes brushing my hair in front of my vanity while wearing an ostrich feathered robe. As I am a normal person and not Lady Mary from Downton Abbey, I settle for my ordinary bedroom. Just so long as it’s mine. All mine. At least when it comes to sleeping.

The idea that people are meant to sleep together in the same bedroom — let alone in the same bed — night after night is absurd.

No, I’m afraid separate beds aren’t enough. When it comes to sleeping, half measures simply won’t do.

Sleeping is my number one priority in life, and I will do everything in my power to protect my need for peaceful slumber. I simply can not function without adequate sleep, and I need more than most people. Experts say you can function on four. My husband averages around six. I require between nine and eleven.

When I say I can’t function without sleep I mean it literally. If I don’t get enough sleep my world falls apart. My anxiety spikes, I catastrophize simple things. My ability to reason disappears. I have zero patience. I often say…

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Jennifer Barnett

Former managing editor of The Atlantic, Teen Vogue, Redbook, and Elle. Now I’m writing. Expat in Amsterdam.