You Are All Invited to My 50th Birthday Party in Amsterdam

The uplifting power of magical thinking during bleak times

These are dark times. We need something to look forward to. You are all invited to my 50th birthday party in Amsterdam. Please start planning now.

I turn 50 on January 5th, 2022. Because January is a crappy month to be in The Netherlands, I’m also going to have a 50th birthday party six months after my actual birthday during the surreal days of Amsterdam summer when it stays light out past 11pm and the cornflower skies are filled with fluffy white clouds featured on all the master painters’ canvasses in the Rijks Museum down the street. The clouds are worthy of mention. They form shapes you don’t even need magic pancakes to see, but there will be magic pancakes at my party if you would like them. There will also be boat rides of varying types. We will of course go out on the Shrimp Whisker, my family’s little canal boat but that’s only for very special guests, of whom you are definitely one. I’ll also be hiring one of the regal Dutch wooden boats with a crystal chandelier and a silver bowl for tulips — that’s really a thing boats here have — and an elegantly stocked bar, varied depending on the festivity that particular day or evening. There will also be a gothic estate in the country with a hedge maze and glass conservatory. I’m inviting Allison Dubois, the…